Bali IB DP English

Posts Tagged ‘Mrs Slottering’

Hot & Not List # 2

In Character Development, Gossip, What's hot what's not on 13/04/2009 at 09:38

To my avid readers, I owe you an apology. It has been quite a while since my last post and you are no doubt experiencing some symptoms of withdrawal. I’ve been on holiday and unfortunately haven’t quite kept an eye on the hotness (and not-ness) happening in Amsterdam and Java…well I DID happen to go to Java to meet some of my colleagues in the world of gossip gurus, but i was having way too much fun to pay attention to the characters of Max Havalaar 😦 But I assure you, my loyal fans, that I am back; more deliciously vicious and critical than ever!
So to re-cap, the top of last edition’s hot list is Scarfman, our poor little writer. His creativity has made him the apple of everyone’s eye…but is his 15 minutes of fame over? Hmm, guess we’ll have to see.
Oh, and as for the most un-hot person of that week, that honor went to none other than Batavus Droopstoppel (37 Lauriergracht!). This coffee broker earned the top 2 places on the not list for not only letting Scarfman fight his battles for him, but also stealing his work many years later. Tsk, tsk, tsk.

Readers, I’m afraid we’re switching gears in this edition of the Hot/Not list. We’re moving on from the people of Amsterdam and to the happenings in Java…but rest assured, we shall be visiting the much loved (and hated) Dutch characters in the future.
I give you, the hot and not people of Lebak, Java:

What’s Hot:

  1. Assistant Regent of Java: This is not so much a person, but rather a position in the Javanese government. Now, I do not claim to have extensive knowledge of Java’s extremely complex political system, but I do know that for some strange reason, the inferior is in charge of the superior. Basically, though he is thought to be the Regent’s lesser, the Assistant Regent is the one really in control. I may not be a fan of politics (yawn), but I do appreciate hard work and responsibility. So kudos to whoever holds the position of the Assistant Regent of Java.
  2. Regent of Java: Again, this is a position, not the person in the position…Now, you may ask why the actual Regent himself is not at the top of the list, but like I said above the Assistant has got the power. The Regent however, is still worthy of this list and he gets 2nd place for representing and speaking in the name of the hundred thousand or more souls that form the population of his Regency. Yay 🙂
  3. Controleur Verbrugge: The first actual person to make in on this edition of the Hot list…he is a ‘good man; cordial, hospitable, informative…blah blah blah. In short, he’s a pretty cool guy so for that reason he earns 3rd place on the list.
  4. Mrs. Havalaar: Though not ‘beautiful’ she makes it on to the list for her other qualities. Her caring nature (particularly towards her children), manners and her generally sweet demeanor reminds us that looks aren’t everything!

What’s Not:

  1. Max Havalaar: You’d expect the person the novel is named after to be hot…but Mr. Havalaar simply isn’t. What a disappointment :(. He is described as being a man of 35 and unremarkable. Ugh. Okay, so I said above looks aren’t everything, and I do mean it dear reader, but there is only so much niceness one list can have! So sorry, Mr Havalaar you are this week’s most un-hot person.
  2. Strangers of the West: Okay so this is not an actually person…but the Europeans who have come to Java have made themselves lords of the land and use it to grow products which have a greater profit back in Europe. Tsk tsk tsk.
  3. Mrs. Slottering: Described as a ‘native’ woman. Now I don’t know exactly what that implies about her personality…but it doesn’t sound very good. Also, the woman can only speak Malay so she gets number 3 for not getting with the program and expanding her vocabulary!
  4. The Great Lord at Buitenzorg: I don’t know much about him but Havalaar describes him as being a man unable to see where injustice is done. Though I can be very shallow and judgmental at times something I do really hate is injustice. So the “Great Lord’ makes it on the Not list for letting injustice happen under his rulership.